Hello my friends. I apologize for the great lack of updating. But in my case if I'm not updating it's because things are going well and there isn't much to report cancer-wise.
Things have been going great, I am thankful and happy to say. I had my scans mid-November and Fran and I met with Dr. Moriarty the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. Since my previous 3 scans, and blood work had been good, I picked off a tiny little chunk out of the I-think-this-scan-will-be-okay-too mountain that has previously been completely untouched.
Dr. Moriarty came in and told us that the scans were good, "phew." He said that as a matter of fact Dr. Nosher who did my SIR-spheres procedure in October of 2010 and has also been doing my scans up until this point, felt that I could wait another 6 months before my next one. "Well" I said, that's a bit nuts, we're not waiting that long. And anyway that's for people who don't have cancer or whatever." To which Dr. Moriarty said in his always very calm demeanor "Well, Karen I can't really say that I can classify you as someone who clinically has any signs of cancer."
"Say, say, say what now!?"
So then I start crying and wringing my fingers so hard I think I am going to tear them straight off. Fran and I were both totally bewildered and I said to Dr. Moriarty "what the heck are you talking about?"
So in a nutshell the report from the PET/CT scan said that it didn't pick up any metabolic activity from any tumor (from the PET) and from CT didn't show any malignancies either. So basically "they couldn't see nothin."
What does this all mean? I didn't update the blog immediately because even though this news is better than miraculously great, it has taken me awhile to process. I think I am still processing and digesting all of this. When Dr. Moriarty was explaining all of this to us, I was truthfully just as shocked as I was when I was told I had cancer.
Right now the doctors don't see any visible signs of cancer in me or on my person. I guess I can be classified as N.E.D. that means (no evidence of disease). That's a sweet phrase and though this is an understatement I am deeply, deeply grateful. The most I was hoping for last year was a long break from chemo. Maybe like 6 months.
So this is a crazy miracle and I am all over it. I am so very grateful to be alive.
For people wondering, (because I know I was, and riddled Dr. Moriarty with a barrage of question my own self), the cancer can come back at any time.
But life right now is good, and right now is sweet. I am trying to just sit back and take into account all that I have been given, and wonder why I have been given it. Then I try not to wonder why and just enjoy my life. But cancer has taken 3 very dear friends of ours this year who went to the ends of the earth to be rid of cancer, heck just to have the damn tumors shrunk. They were young, strong, determined and loved life. They had children, had people who loved them deeply and are missing them so much now. Julia, Jessica, and Adam. Please pray for them and their families during this time of year that is so hard. Especially for their young children. It is because of these amazing people, and friends who are still battling, falling down and picking themselves back up over and over and over again, that I can't help but wonder about where I am at.
Thank you, every single one of you for your prayers, for lighting candles, for your emails, letters, messages and loving support.
Let's keep praying for each other.
Much Love,
Karen
